Fostering friendship to chip away on the ‘epidemic of loneliness’ : Pictures


Jason Silverman, on the train bike, and his pal Melissa Mills go to the health club collectively after they hang around. The pair are a part of the Friendship Mission in Framingham, Massachusetts.

Priyanka Dayal McCluskey/WBUR


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Priyanka Dayal McCluskey/WBUR


Jason Silverman, on the train bike, and his pal Melissa Mills go to the health club collectively after they hang around. The pair are a part of the Friendship Mission in Framingham, Massachusetts.

Priyanka Dayal McCluskey/WBUR

On a typical morning, Jason Silverman lounges at residence in his mattress for hours, with the TV on and the amount turned up. Typically, this every day routine can get lonely.

So he seems ahead to the times his pal, Melissa Mills, picks him up and takes him to a health club in Framingham, Massachusetts, the place they train collectively.

Silverman, 38, has Down syndrome. Speaking is tough for him, however he communicates by smiling, sighing and main Mills by the arm. She’s change into conversant in his routine: Normally they hit the treadmill first, then bike a bit earlier than a lunch break and at last, a swim within the pool.

“We snigger and don’t be concerned about something after we’re collectively,” says Mills, 43. “There is no stress; there isn’t any strain. We’re simply right here to hang around.”

Fostering connection

This connection started in a considerably uncommon approach. Mills, who works in human assets for the state police, volunteers with a small however rising initiative referred to as the Friendship Mission. This system is designed to scale back social isolation — notably for folks with disabilities or psychological well being circumstances — by serving to them construct relationships with others.

“Persons are so remoted and so lonely, and that has such a damaging influence on their high quality of life,” says Jeff Keilson, senior vice chairman of strategic planning at Advocates, the Framingham-based human providers company that runs the Friendship Mission. “If there’s ways in which we might help folks by connecting them with others, then we completely ought to try this.”

Profound results on bodily and psychological well being

This work is rooted in additional than an ethical crucial to assist folks.

A rising physique of analysis reveals loneliness has profound implications for bodily and psychological well being. People who find themselves socially disconnected have a 29% greater threat of coronary heart illness, a 32% better threat of stroke and a 50% elevated threat of dementia for older adults. Loneliness can enhance the chance of untimely dying as a lot as smoking 15 cigarettes a day, in response to a current advisory from the U.S. Surgeon Normal Vivek Murthy’s workplace.

The nation is contending with an “epidemic of loneliness,” in response to that report — and the medication to deal with the issue is social connection.

The Friendship Mission launched through the COVID pandemic and was based on the premise that rising social connection might enhance folks’s lives and even scale back hospital visits. It is too early for information to indicate whether or not the latter is occurring.

Keilson says folks generally find yourself on the hospital as a result of they’re lonely. “By addressing isolation, we might truly have an effect on folks’s use of emergency rooms,” he says.

‘Apparent intervention’ for pervasive drawback

Individuals with disabilities are among the many populations extra more likely to expertise loneliness, however the issue is pervasive. About half of American adults reported feeling lonely in recent times — and that was earlier than the pandemic triggered shutdowns and security measures that additional remoted folks, in response to the surgeon common’s report.

A socially distanced outside lunch in March 2020. Even earlier than the pandemic, isolation emerged as a rising risk to well being.

OLI SCARFF/AFP through Getty Pictures


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OLI SCARFF/AFP through Getty Pictures


A socially distanced outside lunch in March 2020. Even earlier than the pandemic, isolation emerged as a rising risk to well being.

OLI SCARFF/AFP through Getty Pictures

People even have fewer shut mates than they used to, says Daniel Cox, senior fellow on the American Enterprise Institute, who research friendship. And so they discuss to their mates much less usually.

Cox says he is heartened to see extra well being care leaders deal with the significance of friendship.

“If the aim is to assist folks reside longer, more healthy lives, this can be a fairly apparent intervention,” he says.

It takes effort and time to nurture friendships, he notes. “[Instead of] placing the complete accountability on the individual and say: ‘You have to do all the things your self’ — it is truly good to have establishments to step in and assist out, as a result of they will leverage lots of assets.”

Even doing laundry collectively counts

The Friendship Mission has enrolled dozens of contributors up to now — ranging in age from their 20s to their 70s — with plans to develop. Mission leaders are working with some well being insurers, together with Tufts Well being Plan and UnitedHealthcare, to develop the initiative past folks with disabilities and psychological well being circumstances.

The volunteers are background-checked and generally fingerprinted earlier than they meet their new mates. Volunteer coordinator Maryellen Killeen says she encourages the pairs to begin with a easy outing.

“I counsel a stroll, hanging out at residence, taking part in a sport, going to the library,” she says. “Lots of them meet at espresso retailers.”

Different mates take purchasing journeys, or do laundry collectively.

For Mills and Silverman, health club visits have change into a month-to-month ritual.

The pair met earlier this 12 months and obtained alongside instantly. Silverman’s mom and first caregiver, Stephanie Lynch, says he appears happier and extra assured since he began spending time with Mills.

“It is simply human — folks want companionship. They should really feel a part of one thing,” she says.

Friendship on the cellphone

Connections can develop even on the cellphone. That is the pondering behind the Telephone Buddies program at Commonwealth Care Alliance, or CCA, a Boston-based well being insurer for seniors and other people with important medical wants. In 2020, the insurer started recruiting its personal administrative staff as volunteer mates. Now, CCA can also be working with Advocates, the human providers company answerable for the Friendship Mission, to assist extra of its members make connections.

Chris Palmieri, CCA’s chief govt, mentioned these social interactions are designed to assist members keep more healthy and keep away from pointless hospital visits.

And whereas the cellphone chats aren’t medical doctors’ appointments, medical points generally come up. If this occurs, the volunteer pal is ready to relay messages to the member’s care staff. “If we’re having a reference to any individual,” Palmieri says, “we [can] decide up some cues on the cellphone calls. We are able to refer them into care that may have fallen by means of the cracks.”

Michelle Somerville, a top quality specialist at CCA, volunteers about quarter-hour each Tuesday to name Ida Rodriguez, a CCA member in Lawrence.

Regardless of their distance — they reside 100 miles aside and have by no means met in individual — the 2 have change into keen on one another. They discuss their households, their well being and their favourite objects on the Taco Bell menu.

Somerville says she enjoys listening to in regards to the books Rodriguez reads, from Dan Brown to Dostoevsky.

“I need somebody to learn to me, however I do not wish to learn myself,” Somerville says with a smile. “So it was a match made in heaven.”

Rodriguez says her social life has slowed down as she’s gotten older, and the weekly check-ins remind her she has a pal. On a current name, she informed Somerville how a lot the connection means to her.

“Everyone wants any individual to speak to,” she says, “?”



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